A couple of days ago, I had to send someone to the clinic for an appointment. Normally I’d wait for her in the car until it’s over because it’s hard to get a parking spot and I don’t like the crowd. It’s suffocating. It’s a hassle to drive back home then back to the place to pick her up. So, that day, I bought some breakfast so I could eat in the car. I did not even sleep the night before because I just couldn’t.

I waited for 2 hours in the car and she was nowhere to be seen. Called her on the cell phone only to be told she was still waiting to see the doc. Okay, fine. I decided to wait for a little while more. But then another hour passed, the sun was up directly above me, and I felt like I was suffocating in the hot car. Called her again only to be told she’s not even near done yet.

Now, the question is, why in the hell did she not use the damn cell phone to call me and told me it’s gonna be long?

I could’ve gone home 3 hours earlier and took a nap instead of being roasted alive like a rotisserie chicken at Kenny Rogers. Why? This is so typical of people. Nobody has ever bothered to let me know things. They think it’s okay to fuck me up.

Nobody even bothered to let me know at college when a class or a meeting was canceled.
Nobody even bothered to update me on things and just leave me in the dark and then I get blamed for not knowing things.
Nobody even bothered to call me up to hang out.
Nobody even bothered to say hi to me just to chat.
Nobody has even bothered to ask me if I’m doing okay.

When I do get someone to talk to (it’s always a guy), it’s because they want something from me. When I don’t show interest in being more than just a friend, they leave me. Just like that. Like I’m some kind of trash.

In my Facebook, I never get any likes for anything I’ve posted nowadays when my other “friends” would get 50-200 likes for the stupidest status update they posted. None of the people I used to know, be it in elementary school, high school, Japanese school or 2 different colleges, ever bothered to talk to me anymore. Or to keep in touch.

Am I fucking invisible to people? Am I already dead to people?

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Bury Me